As I began homeschooling my children, it became clear to me that as my role was expanding now to be both parent and teacher, it was also necessary for me to give myself and my children the tools needed for us all to thrive in this new dynamic.
As their lifestyle was drastically shifted from active littles with activities, play dates and birthday parties galore, it’s only normal that they may experience different emotions as they process and cope with the change in their realities.
It’s critical that as parents, we help our children tune in and connect with these emotions and feeling and help them start to understand what these feelings are, identify them and process them.
In addition, as much as I would love to think that my child wants to come to me for everything, the truth is, they enjoy having different role models in their lives and have built their own relationships, trust and dynamics in each of these relationships that helps them thrive.
In an effort to help my children and I thrive in this new lifestyle, I started to incorporate End of Day Reflections with my children, through a practice called “Rose, Thorne & Bud”, that has been extremely supportive and fun in many ways.
At dinner each night, we go around the table and answer the questions.
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End of Day Reflections using Rose, Thorn, Bud
The first question we ask is how they felt today. It’s lovely because I watch my kids really stop and reflect on their day. They think through the events of the day and check in with how they are feeling. They then verbalize it and often expand on it. They might say, “I feel happy today because I got to spend more time with daddy and that made me feel good.
Next is to discuss the Rose. The “Rose” is something that was a success, a highlight or something positive that happened that day. Once again, this not only gives them an opportunity to think about what they are proud of from the day and relish in that moment of appreciation of an accomplishment, but it also helps us as parents understand what makes them feel proud or successful. What they are enjoying and feeling great about.
The “Thorn” is next. The “Thorn” is a challenge you experienced or something you felt you could have used support with or done better at. This I have found to not only be helpful in showing what has felt challenging for my child, but also gives them space and the opportunity, to ask for support knowing they have space to do so. It’s an opportunity to pause and let the child really think about what they could do better with.
This has been ranged from them feeling they should have shared with their siblings better to them expressing they want to spend more time learning to read. I think making it a practice to discover what you could have done better at, in a constructive manner, is important as it allows us to set intentions to improve ourselves.
Last is the “Bud”. The Bud is a new idea or something you’re looking forward to knowing or understanding, or just something you’re excited about. This allows the kids to let us in on what they are most curious about and what they are most eager to accomplish, which allows me to better support them in that. It’s also just a really positive way to end the exercise, making it a really feel good experience for everyone, along with productive.
Since I like to make life easier for you busy mamas, I created a free downloadable for you to use with your kids.
I’m actually hole punching each one and putting it into a binder, creating a reference of their thoughts and feelings during this special time. 💖
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To get your free End of Day Reflections Guide for Kids, click here.  I would love to see how you’re using your guide and if you’re seeing benefits so if you can tag me on social (@mishavayner)  that would be amazing! Also, please share any questions or comments below!
Additionally, if you, Mama, need some support in this department, I also have a free Mindful Mama Guide, that walks you through setting up your own mindfulness practice to support you on this journey as well.
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The mindset shift that allows you to do it all, without doing it all
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